Attitudes and Gender Communication
Starting in childhood, people are generally socialized to belong to distinct cultures based on their gender and learn to speak in ways particular to their own gender’s rules and norms (Fivush; Hohnson; Tannen). This pattern of gendered socialization continues throughout our lives. As a result, people of different genders often interpret the same conversation differently. Culturally diverse ways of speaking based on gender can cause miscommunication between members of each culture or speech community.
Although gender roles are changing and gender itself is becoming a more fluid concept, traditional roles still influence our communication behaviors. For those socialized to traditional female gender norms, an important use of communication is to create and foster relational connections with other people (Johnson; Stamou). In contrast, the goal of men’s communication is primarily to establish identity. This is accomplished by demonstrating independence and control and entertaining or performing for others.
Deborah Tannen, professor of linguistics and the author of multiple books on gender and language, provides the following examples of differences in men’s and women’s communication:
- “Men engage in report talk, women in rapport talk.”
- Report talk is used to demonstrate one’s knowledge and expertise.
- Rapport talk is used to share and cultivate relationships.
- Women request; men direct.
- For example, in communicating a request, a female manager might say: “Could you do this by 5 PM?” A male manager would typically phrase it: “This needs to be done by 5 PM.”
- Women are information-focused; men are image-focused.
- For example, women are willing to ask questions to clarify understanding. Men tend to avoid asking clarifying questions in order to preserve their reputation.
- Empathy is not an apology.
- Women often use the phrase “I’m sorry” to express concern or empathy. Men tend to interpret this phrase as an acceptance of responsibility for the situation, which it is not.
- Women are judged by their appearance; men are judged by what they say and do.[1]
stereotype
A stereotype is a widely held but oversimplified image or idea of a particular type of person or thing.
Some traits may tend to be more common in one gender compared to another but it’s important to avoid stereotyping. Remember that while these differences exist between groups, all individuals will fall somewhere along a spectrum of these characteristics and behaviors.
Gender in the World
Traditional gender roles also influence how women are heard, as Tannen alluded to above. The Oxford Handbook of Leadership and Organization notes that the historical marginalization of women is still in practice today, with media coverage of women leaders often focusing on fashion sensibility rather than on the strength of their leadership. There is a no-win situation for women: “to be ‘too feminine’ is to risk being perceived as weak and emotional or as manipulative and devious when exercising leadership; to be ‘insufficiently feminine’ generally results in being labeled as masculine, abrasive or pushy.”[2] Thus, gender not only impacts the language we use but the language used to describe us.
Pregnant People
Historically, the term “pregnant women” was the norm, based on the idea that only individuals assigned female at birth could become pregnant. As awareness of gender diversity has grown, inclusive language aims to recognize that not all who can become pregnant identify as women. To be inclusive of transgender and non-binary individuals, individuals who are pregnant are now often referred to as “pregnant people.” In recent years, medical organizations, such as the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention and the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, and news outlets, such as National Public Radio, have adopted the more inclusive term “pregnant people.”[3]
However, some women’s health experts are critical of the use of gender-inclusive language in this particular context. They argue that removing references to biological sex could lead to reduced visibility and prioritization of women’s health in medical research.[4] Experts also caution that using more inclusive language such as “parents” or “families” in place of “mothers” could have the effect of diminishing and marginalizing women whose “needs and rights in relation to pregnancy, birth, and breastfeeding . . . are not shared with others.”[5]
- Bucher, Richard D. Diversity Consciousness Opening Our Minds to People, Cultures, and Opportunities. Pearson, 2015, p 130. ↵
- David D. Day, ed., The Oxford Handbook of Leadership and Organization. Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2014. https://books.google.com/books?id=_iqTAwAAQBAJ&pg=PA735&lpg=PA735&dq=gender+bias+language+nancy+pelosi&source=bl&ots=SzNkjbkn7-&sig=kQoD7GfBYJDX_fujtCZXqkV8t2c&hl=en&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiGh7qcj8faAhULbK0KHXg7D9kQ6AEIRzAF#v=onepage&q=gender%20bias%20language%20nancy%20pelosi&f=false ↵
- NPR. “An infusion of inclusion into the news.” NPR, February 18, 2022. Accessed July 3, 2024. https://www.npr.org/sections/publiceditor/2022/02/18/1081846292/an-infusion-of-inclusion-into-the-news. ↵
- Migdon, Brooke. “Experts warn gender-neutral language like ‘pregnant people’ may put mothers at risk.” The Hill, February 1, 2022. Accessed July 3, 2024. https://thehill.com/changing-america/respect/diversity-inclusion/592335-experts-warn-gender-neutral-language-like/. ↵
- Gribble, Karleen D., Susan Bewley, Melissa C. Bartick, Roger Mathisen, Shawn Walker, Jenny Gamble, Nils J. Bergman, Arun Gupta, Jennifer J. Hocking, and Hannah G. Dahlen. “Effective Communication About Pregnancy, Birth, Lactation, Breastfeeding and Newborn Care: The Importance of Sexed Language.” Frontiers in Global Women’s Health 3 (February 7, 2022). https://doi.org/10.3389/fgwh.2022.818856. ↵